Your Unique Brand

Listen up, because this is important. You are not crazy. You are not undateable. You are not doing dating “wrong”. You are not the only one getting ghosted, bread-crumbed,  cushioned or benched. You are not the only one wondering what this new terminology for bad dating behavior means and why on earth it got created.

The current culture of dating is complicated.

It’s literally a jungle out there. Before this mayhem, person would meet person and they would go on a date. Now, It’s almost like scoring a great job interview: you scroll through endless choices, select a few options, research through some combination of texting, calling, skyping, in order to get some one on one, IRL time.

Navigating this maze of choice leaves people concerned they will end up with the same fate as Jack Nicholson in the Shining: frozen and alone.  

There are a lot of articles on creating your perfect dating profile, finding the hottest spots to meet singles, how to take the perfect profile pic or how to play the allegorithm.

We are not going to go there. Instead, we’re going to ask you to take a different approach: create your personalized brand and put yourself out there. In short- Do you, and do it confidently.

Do you have 5 cats? Great! Talk about it. Do you love eating jars of pb with a spoon while watching episodes of the Biggest Loser? Cool! Let people know. Do you secretly wish that you could grow an extra finger for dexterity reasons and just curiosity about what would happen? Fab. We love that creative mind you have.

The thing is, one of the trickiest parts of modern dating is that people are fearful to embrace their individuality. We do not all love taking a selfie, while climbing Mt. Kilamanjaro, holding a tiger, flexing shirtless. But if you spent 30 minutes dating by tech, you would certainly think an epidemic has taken hold. And imagine. If you are showing up as someone you aren’t, you are not giving yourself the opportunity to meet the person that is right for you (and you are at risk of meeting the person that actually does love doing the above).

May this approach result in less hits on your app, online profile or limit the places you go to meet others? Yes, hopefully. Although we are a culture that is all about instant gratification and trying to get the most “likes” on social media, the reality is finding partnership is not quick or a popularity contest.

Regardless of the amount of dates you go on, there are probably only a few people out there that you are really truly going to connect with on a deep romantic level. So take a breath, embrace your fab self and be a bit fearless.

Want to work on this? Contact us.

your planRachel Perlstein